Allow me to jot down my very interesting life for the scrutiny of the world. Otherwise, the very poor wailing brain of mine might just choose to forget everything and not let me write them down at all.
I shall proceed to recount things in a very haphazard manner, and in case you got confused halfway, don’t worry, it is not because you are stupid.
It is because you are really stupid.
When I came home from school, I was telling my mother that today got this whole new bunch of fresh, out of the oven and very likely half-baked teachers coming to our school to learn and teach. Our class got one of them. And suay enough, she was the one I commented on earlier that morning to Phiephie.
It went something like that:
Me: Eh, how come our school got so many unidentified fellows piaoooing around?
Phie: Arhh, must be the teachers fresh out of ITE.
Me: See lar, nowadays, no job then everyone go be teacher.
Phie: True true. Teacher dunnid qualifications, dunnid experience and all the ah-gou-ah-mao (meaning Tom, Dick and Harry) all want to be teachers. That’s why now good teachers are so rare. Mr Tan is a rare, good teacher.
Me: Agreed. =secretly dislikes anyone who go around teaching without the passion= And that teacher looks like an ah-lian with her hair like that and punching away on her mobile.
Phie: Told you the “jiaoyusuiping” now no good already.
Later on during Physics, the same teacher which I called an ahlian came in. I gave Sophia this looks that stated clearly “Why am I so suay???” Such unlucky coincidences indeed.
So back home, I was telling my mother about the half-baked teachers and what not and she told me that China also like that one lar. Like no job, no money then go and be a teacher. Of course I am not saying all teachers are like that—-it is just that MORE and MORE teachers are teachers because they cannot be anything better. Thou get what I mean?
Awesome passionate teachers like Mr Eric Tan is a rare breed. Some one please go near him and get yourself infected by his passion. 😀 And if you get Mr Tan as a form teacher and chem teacher, you must have been Mother Teresa in your last life! I might be, you know!! 😀
Anyway, I just had dinner and so my blogging got interrupted, and now I have to tell you all something else. Which is how one is supposed to de-skin a piece of Longan. I used to just randomly drive my nail into any spot on the coarse brown skin of the Longan that was not unlike that of an armadillo’s. And it would take me a long time to slowing break off the persistent skin.
But today, I saw my momkins driving her nail into the tip where the stalk is growing, yes yes that concave section, and hoila, the dry skin of the longan fell apart revealing its sweet and tender insides. 😀 I decided to give it a try, and yay it worked. My yay sounded so forced, lord.
Today when I reached home, my mother was going on about how pampered children are nowadays simply because some parents are really such dimwits. I have to agree you know. That was quite true. And while she was complaining, I finished eating my very non-meat meal of toufu, egg and rice and snuggled down into bed for a afternoon nap.
I was using my mum’s pillow of course. 😀 =cheeky=
I turned on the air-con and the fan, and was feeling so “liang shuang” and blissful while my mum kept up her tirade of how some parenting is totally failed, while I oinked my replies.
Slowly I drifted off into dreamland, sighing happily because air-con + snuggly blanket = heaven for me.
Then an hour later, I was rudely awaken by my own body heating up and smoldering in that previously snuggly blanket. I was hot, bothered and covered in a light sheen of sweat.
While I was touring Dreamland joyously, moma turned off the air con AND the fan.
And I do have to tell you that she always does things half way.
Which means that she did not open the window.
Now, my dear ostriches, still and stale air encourages only one thing.
So I sort of fermented away in that blanket, and produced some really stinky alcohol, aka sweat. 😀
And later I confronted my mother, telling her that I almost fermented, and all she did was to laugh.
I can understand why I guess, free alcohol, why not? 😀
This morning met this really unreasonable fellow on the bus. I wondered to myself whether she was male or female, but decided that she was a female because of very slight bumps on her chest.
Let me describe her to you. Short, tom-boyish hair, face set in a permanent sneer, shoulders hunched with a slingbag slung across her chest to emphasize her non-existent boobs, and looked totally GUYISH.
And she was telling me, who was already flattening myself against this very indignant Indian lady to make space for the boarding passengers, “EXCUSE ME!!!”
In a very loud, irritating voice that tells me that she had very little manners and consideration.
And she proceeded to shove me out of the way, right into the cross Indian Lady’s behind. I was very very disturbed indeed and kept up a string of curses under my breath.
I am a mean person, therefore I silently wished that she would never get married with that smelly, unruly temper of her and her bony interfering hands.
There was another ahjumma who demanded to be excused today.
She was rather fat and potty, probably in hr mid-fifties, wearing tasteless hot pink top with ugly sequins blinding the eyes of all passengers. She jabbed me with her elbow to pass.
Not because I didn’t try to flatten myself further, but because she was so humongous that she probably needed a airport runway to move through safely.
Kidding. But she was mean.
You know what, people? Instead of saying “excuse me” and expect people to part like the red sea for you who think you are Moses, you should instead try to squeeze through and apologize to all those whom you have squeezed past at the same time.
That, is a better and more practical idea.
As for Fifty Shades of Grey, I am planning to re-read it and see if my opinion of it changes upon my second reading, and I will try to have it up asap (: So, JW, please don’t be upset or anything, kay?
You are all tomatoes.
Because I say so. 😀