One of our life’s greatest arrogance is the assumption that others are automatically interested in our affairs.
Yup, I am closing my Facebook account again this time, and hopefully I won’t bother opening it again anytime before Block Test 2 (and hopefully won’t open it after Block Test 2).
Before you partake in some conclusion jumping and finger pointing, hear me out. I am not closing it entirely due to exams: closing an account never necessitates good revision, it produces a facade of diligence. If you are unmotivated and distracted (like I have been in the past Term), closing Facebook is not going to help you (much).
I am shutting it primarily because I can’t even remember why I decided to reopen it in the first place. Maybe reading some news updates from History and Current Affairs society was mildly enriching, as was checking out some things I have missed in the two months plus of absence from the buzzing social media. Oh, maybe the updates from Chalany High Heels was rather cool too, not to mention very very distracting.
Anyways, maybe it is part of the phase that I am going through that I am increasingly hermetic and anti-social because I am so very exhausted most of the time, both mentally and physically. Or it could be how everything is wearing out my nerve endings, leaving me short fused and impatient. In summary, I am too tired to be interested in what is going on in the school social life, because knowing things is tiring in itself. Not to mention that it takes up some memory space.
I came to the realization that the day we stopped updating everything single thing that passes through our mind, every change of emotions and sentiments and every thing that we do on the internet is the day we realize that perhaps, no one is seriously going to be interested in what we are saying. It is like entering this room crowded with people and everyone is talking and commenting simultaneously, listening with the intent of replying rather than understanding. Facebook, at times, felt like a stifling, virtual version of real life.
More than that, Facebook felt like a modernized Vanity Fair (I need to get this book, it is no more than $5.00 in Popular, and the low price feel like a back-handed insult to Thackeray). Selfies, groupies, selca, OOTD, Hair-of-the-day, Nonsense-of-the-day are all tolerable individually, but when presented as a whole, it becomes tedious and exhausting.
I am as guilty as charged for being a participant in the Vanity Fair that I have only so lately come to recognize it for itself, and I suppose that it could be an anti-movement against the internet and social-hub? Is that what you call it? I sometimes didn’t want to be an active part of the activity that was both tiring and in a manner, staged. At other times, I too indulge in it.
There is so much conflict and dilemma, confusion and an undercurrent of stress and annoyance. So, no more facebook, no more scowling at people’s posts or making funny faces.
Forget RIP maybe? Start LIP: Live In Peace instead.
P.S. This Friday to next Monday are going to be some really terribly tough days, I hope I can push through without short-circuiting or snapping at people…too much.